The Freedom in Being Average: Overcoming Perfectionism and Endless Striving

There is an undeniable pressure in modern society to be extraordinary. Messages about achieving greatness, standing out, and always pushing further are everywhere—especially with social media showcasing highlight reels of people’s most successful moments. This constant comparison can create a fear of being "average," as if not achieving more means failure.

But what if being average wasn’t something to fear? What if embracing where you are now, without the relentless need to push forward at all costs, could actually bring more peace and fulfillment?

The Perfectionist Trap: Striving, Never Arriving

Many ambitious individuals—those who are high-achievers, perfectionists, and always looking for the next big goal—find themselves caught in a cycle of striving without ever truly arriving. The moment one milestone is reached, the next is set, and satisfaction remains fleeting. This pattern can be seen in athletes who never feel like they've achieved enough, professionals constantly chasing promotions, or even individuals pursuing financial success, only to move the goalpost each time they hit their target.

The issue isn’t ambition itself—growth and progress are important—but rather the inability to find contentment along the way. If happiness is only tied to the next achievement, it becomes an unattainable destination rather than something experienced in the present.

The Reality of "Average"

For many, the thought of being "just average" is unsettling. Society promotes the idea that success means being the best, standing out, and constantly pushing forward. But in reality, most people live ordinary lives, doing ordinary things. And there's nothing wrong with that.

In fact, embracing the idea that an "average" life can be fulfilling is a powerful shift in mindset. A home, a family, a steady job—these things might not be extraordinary by social media standards, but they can bring deep satisfaction when aligned with personal values.

The Cost of Always Striving

While chasing goals, it’s easy to overlook what is sacrificed along the way. Prioritizing career success might mean missing out on time with loved ones. Pushing for financial goals could come at the cost of health and well-being. Saying "yes" to one ambition often means saying "no" to something else.

This is why it's important to step back and ask:

• Why is this goal important to me?

• Am I chasing this because I truly want it, or because of external pressures?

• What am I sacrificing in pursuit of this?

• If I never reached the next level, could I still find happiness?

Recognizing that balance is key allows space for fulfillment beyond achievements.

Redefining Success on Personal Terms

Success is deeply personal and doesn't need to fit a societal mold. Some may find it in career accomplishments, while others prioritize family, health, or simply a peaceful life. There’s no universal definition of "doing well"—only what feels right based on individual values.

Even within different seasons of life, priorities can shift. Someone in their 20s may be focused on career growth, while later, family life or well-being might take precedence. There’s no wrong way to navigate life, as long as decisions align with personal goals and not just external expectations.

The Ego and the Fear of Slowing Down

For those used to achieving, slowing down or stepping back can feel uncomfortable. There's a deeply ingrained belief that stopping means failing. However, true growth comes from understanding that self-worth isn’t defined by accomplishments.

Reflecting on why achievement feels so necessary can uncover past influences—perhaps a childhood where validation only came through success, or witnessing struggles that led to an ingrained fear of "falling behind." Examining these beliefs can help untangle the need to constantly prove oneself.

Finding Peace in the Present

Accepting "average" doesn’t mean giving up on dreams—it means recognizing that self-worth isn’t dependent on them. It allows space to enjoy life without the weight of constant comparison.

Instead of measuring success by external milestones, consider:

• How do I want to feel each day?

• What small moments bring joy?

• What matters most in this season of life?

By shifting focus from achievement to fulfillment, life becomes more about living and less about endlessly chasing the next big thing.

To learn more about this topic, check out our latest Podcast Episode: Happy Being Average